When Giving Up isn’t Giving Up

I often talk about my stubbornness, it’s been a strong part of my personality since I was quite little.  And it comes into play in many ways.  For instance if I commit to doing something then I have a very hard time letting it go.  Even if that thing I’ve committed to is clearly not working for me.  I find myself thinking of it as “quitting.”  I question if I am perhaps simply being lazy, not pushing myself to my full potential.

But giving up on something, or stopping work on it, isn’t always a bad thing.  There are many applications of this in life — but for the sake of this post I am thinking particularly about writing.

 Sometimes you have to let go of a project in order to make room for another, as a matter of prioritizing.  I encountered this recently with the decision to stop active updates on Disparate Threads.  The story was taking all of my attention, and all of my energy.  Which meant I was putting all my efforts into what was supposed to be a fun side project, and getting nowhere on my novel.

At first I tried to just adjust my schedule, to update with less frequency, but it was still taking all my energy and I found myself running into my deadlines.  I kept thinking, “If I just get a few months ahead, then I can focus on editing the novel.”

I’ve been saying that to myself since December and the editing progress on the novel had been very slow.  In a race, it would have been outpaced by a snail.  A few times.

So I had to let something go, and since the novel is where I really want my focus to be, it was Disparate Threads that needed to be placed aside.  Though I fully intend to return to it, to update again (with more polished updates, a revised beginning, and more consistent characters), it still felt an awful lot like giving up.

In the weeks since I made the decision, though, I’ve found myself making great progress on the novel.  Being able to really focus and think about it.  As many friends reassured me when I made the decision, I am simply refocusing my energy.  I am not giving up.  This does not make me a “quitter.”  There is nothing wrong with shelving a project that simply isn’t working.

Have you ever faced a moment of decision like that?

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This is my monthly post as part of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group, a great group of supportive writers, helping one another through our writing ups-and-downs.
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