If you’ve been paying even the slightest amount of attention to my blog or social media presence, then you know that I’ve gotten involved with fighting up for what I believe my country should stand for. Which is pretty all-consuming right now – it feels like an endless fight. For those in it with me, you understand how I’m feeling at least in some way – otherwise it would be easy to turn things off for a while and step away. However, when it feels like we are on the verge of the destruction of our society (and not in a good – destroy those things that are wrong so that we can be a better place for everyone – way) stepping away for a moment is hard to do.
It is hard to feel like anything else is important. Including that novel I’ve been working on. I started out January strong with the editing. Slow, but strong; making much needed changes. And then Inauguration Day happened and my time seemed to no longer be my own. Suddenly there were phone calls to make, updates to write, postcards to create, and things to read (because I had – and continue to have – a lot to learn on a lot of issues that are at stake right now).
Now it feels self-indulgent to edit. I know it isn’t, I know it’s important work as well, but justifying the time for it is hard to do. Especially when my own self-doubts flare up and I start doubtingbthat it’s something anyone will want to read. I know I have to push through that – at the very least it’s important self-care to take time for my writing.
Art is important during hard times. Artists serve so many purposes, and their work can rally, lift up, and encourage. So it’s important that I take the time for my art it just… it can be hard to justify to myself.